15. Saints & Purgatory
INFERNAL INTERNET
My Dear Rehtulnitram,
What's going on? I thought that getting rid of that priest would fix things? Can I believe my eyes? You write that two messengers from heaven and one other paid a nocturnal visit upon your minister associate. This is quite unusual, and I shall complain foul. You were able to overhear their messages and they were about, of all things, this nagging topic of purgatory again. Let me see. The first was St. Pope Gregory the Great. He states: "As for certain lesser faults, we must believe that, before the Final Judgment, there is a purifying fire. He who is truth says that whoever utters blasphemy against the Holy Spirit will be pardoned neither in this age nor in the age to come. From this sentence we understand that certain offenses can be forgiven in this age, but certain others in the age to come" (Dial. 4:39). The angels were bad enough, and Mary has always been a headache, but now the other saints are getting into the act. The second was an Eastern doctor, St. John Chrysostom: "Let us help and commemorate them. If Job's son's were purified by their father's sacrifice, why would we doubt that our offerings for the dead bring them some consolation? Let us not hesitate to help those who have died and to offer our prayers for them" (Hom. in 1 Cor. 41:5). Boils and gouls, what interference! And yet, what took the cake was the third apparition, a ghost from purgatory-- his dearly departed mother: "Pray for me son. I did not love as I should. Pray for me that the fire of divine love will quickly fashion me into a saint of paradise. Pray for me." He has resigned his ministry post and is seriously wavering toward Romanism.
Yes, I know that you generally did a good job, but hell is not fair. I will expect you at breakfast tomorrow. Our meeting should only take about an hour. Then, what's left of you can leave.
Slubgob
My Dear Rehtulnitram,
What's going on? I thought that getting rid of that priest would fix things? Can I believe my eyes? You write that two messengers from heaven and one other paid a nocturnal visit upon your minister associate. This is quite unusual, and I shall complain foul. You were able to overhear their messages and they were about, of all things, this nagging topic of purgatory again. Let me see. The first was St. Pope Gregory the Great. He states: "As for certain lesser faults, we must believe that, before the Final Judgment, there is a purifying fire. He who is truth says that whoever utters blasphemy against the Holy Spirit will be pardoned neither in this age nor in the age to come. From this sentence we understand that certain offenses can be forgiven in this age, but certain others in the age to come" (Dial. 4:39). The angels were bad enough, and Mary has always been a headache, but now the other saints are getting into the act. The second was an Eastern doctor, St. John Chrysostom: "Let us help and commemorate them. If Job's son's were purified by their father's sacrifice, why would we doubt that our offerings for the dead bring them some consolation? Let us not hesitate to help those who have died and to offer our prayers for them" (Hom. in 1 Cor. 41:5). Boils and gouls, what interference! And yet, what took the cake was the third apparition, a ghost from purgatory-- his dearly departed mother: "Pray for me son. I did not love as I should. Pray for me that the fire of divine love will quickly fashion me into a saint of paradise. Pray for me." He has resigned his ministry post and is seriously wavering toward Romanism.
Yes, I know that you generally did a good job, but hell is not fair. I will expect you at breakfast tomorrow. Our meeting should only take about an hour. Then, what's left of you can leave.
Slubgob
posted by Father Joe Jenkins at
6:55 AM
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